What an amazing time of year for so many people and yet for another set of people it's the hardest time of year to cope and deal with life. I used to be one of the people in the latter group - in many ways I hated the holidays - felt like I had to "fake" my happiness - I was expecting people's reactions to my gifts to be more than what they showed - and that was disappointing for my heart. THIS YEAR is very different. My son, Lincoln, has changed that for me this year. I look at life so very differently now - through his eyes - and more importantly, my Savior's eyes... or at least I try to.
This year, I was able to receive some amazing gifts of love and generosity! A gal in my LifeGroup wanted to do something amazing - she paid off my credit card! WOW!!! Then I received a gift card to Lane Bryant for $100 for some new clothes!!! And a STARBUCKS card! JACKPOT!!! But the biggest gift that I can think of is when Mark gave his heart to Jesus last night at Christmas Eve service! Now we'll have to see how "real" it is by how he reacts and responds to things, but I know that Jesus has saved him and that if he allows Jesus to really move in his heart, GREAT things will happen...but that's up to him on what he will allow Jesus to do...
I am in hopes and prayers that I will be moving back home to California sometime next year. I have grown soooo much here in KY, but I am really wanting Lincoln to be around family as he grows up and while he can. I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to have my father's influence on my son, with his Godly wisdom, as well as, just what it means to be a man. I can't teach him those things, or not very well, but I know that my Dad would be able to bestow upon him some great knowledge...
Mark moved back in for a SHORT time to save up money for his own place and boy, am I really looking forward to him moving out and him being independent...cut all ties for good...
More to come in the beginning of the year...
