Christmas in a Week???

 I sit here going through in my mind, the mental struggle this journey has been. I look back at what mental state that I was in to where I am now.

I started this weight loss journey on a serious effort May 2019 at the weight of 349 lbs. I then hired my Coach - Melanie Martin IFBB Pro - to take it to the next level in May 2020. I started with her at 289 lbs. I have then gotten down to 262 (currently at 264) and have lost 20 inches!!!! 

I have had a hard time mentally being strong to push through since July 2020, but still trying. In the past I would have just given up and said, heck with it all. But then I caught the bug of body building and wanting to compete. I hated runnin (which was what I was doing for exercise  - loved the community - hated the running aspect of it). Here, I feel powerful, strong, confident (in most areas). Where I am lacking is the mental game that this sport is - which to be honest, is the most important one of them all. I have to conquer my fears of failing. The self-doubt is real. Can I really do this? Am I mentally strong enough to get on stage? Can I be consistent with not only my meal plan, but my workouts that it's going to take to get me to the level that I want to achieve? 

My ultimate goal: Go to Ms. Olympia and WIN IT!

My first goal: Fat Loss

Then: Compete and win my class that qualifies me to go to Nationals

Then: Go to a National show and win my IFBB Pro Card

Then: Compete on Pro level - get sponsorships, possibly be a fitness model, etc.

Then: Qualify to go to Olympia

I know that this can be done - just going to take the mental toughness and consistency to get there. So what am I going to do to prepare me for all of this: 75 Hard. 75 Hard days of 2 a day workouts that are 45 min in length with one of them being outside, reading 10 pages of personal development book, drinking a gal of water daily, no sugar, no cheat meals, and... being honest about it - if I mess up one day - back to square one.

So, starting Dec. 28tth - I'm starting this with a few of my friends to help with accountability and support. They are competitors too (at least they've done 1 show).

Here is the latest progress pics... 

Top is May 1, 2020 when I started with Coach at 289

Bottom was Dec 10, 2020 at 266

SLOW BUT SURELY

December.... ALREADY????

 How is it December already and I have noticed that I did not post at all in the month of NOV!!! WHAT??? Was I THAT busy or consumed by life to not post?

Itt was a crazy month and emotions were and are all over the map it seems. I'm learning how to handle the emotional side of eating and being healthy. To change one's behaviors from a negative to a positive is taking more time than I liked. It is a continuing process of changing life long habits. 

I will try to do better in posting - it has been an emotional month of Nov, but still need to document my journey of being morbidly obese to competition stage...